Saturday, March 23, 2013

Friends who tell you what you're thinking

I have a few friends who know me well enough to not only tell me what they're thinking (and believe me, they do) but to also make sense of the storm cloud of thoughts perpetually above my head and tell me what I am in fact thinking.

I am currently in Nashville visiting my friend Liz, and she is definitely one of those friends. We've known each other since our freshman year of college, so September will mark 10 years of friendship. A crazy but true fact.

One example of this deep knowingness which Liz has. During lunch I said something to the effect of, "I always just thought since I think through things so deeply and intensely that I should be with someone who thinks the same way." Liz's response: "Your poor children."

Thus far our time (my roommate Karen is here too) in Nashville has consisted of: seeing some parks, taking a tour of the Vanderbilt campus, eating lots of food, going to the same coffee shop twice b/c cinnamon honey latte amazingness, eating meatball subs in a car, meeting Liz's friends at a game night, witnessing Liz win a competition for her thesis presentation, and a craw fish boil.

Also, I am well, well, well, on my way to accomplishing many of my 2013 goals. But that update will be for another time.

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Reasons why this day rocks

1. My Pandora station (inspired by The Civil Wars) is killing it this morning. Just started playing my favorite Gungor song.
2. I'm studying participles and only feel of slightly below average intelligence.
3. Wearing a pair of brand new size 8 petite jeans which I got to buy recently.
4. Just got word I got into the class I was waitlisted for.
5. My coffee is really good.
6. My shirt is pink - like VERY pink.
7. I am sitting by a window in the coffee shop and the sun is shining slightly through the clouds.
8. I ate a ham and cheese croissant about breakfast.

On my way to my Tuesday morning study session in the coffee shop I was praying very earnestly that God would equip me to love well today - to see every interaction and moment as an opportunity to love those who he has entrusted to my care. On days like today, where everything is spectacular, it seems easy to do such a thing.

Sunday, March 10, 2013

If at first you don't succeed, eat another piece of cake

Back in January I resolved NOT to make any New Year's Resolutions and instead made 13 New Year's Resolutions. One of which was to go three month's without any refined sugar. So, starting February 17, I set out to accomplish that goal. The start date was strategic as it meant I'd be able to eat birthday cake on May 17.

I am sad to say that as of Friday, March 8, I fell off that New Year's Resolution wagon. And tonight, instead of opting to get back on the wagon, I went and bought a comfortable pair of shoes because I'd rather walk. And as I walk I'll be eating another piece of carrot cake and some M&Ms.

Friday, March 8, 2013

Is guarding your heart a bunch of bs?

I have a crush on a boy.

I don't want to say anything related to said boy, i.e. how long I've known him, whether or not we've spoken, etc. All I will disclose is that he is a boy, he is of legal dating age, and he is not married (I don't think.) I also realize that saying "crush on a boy" may be juvenile, but saying "I have strong feelings for a man" just sounds ridiculous. I choose juvenile.

I have two friends who have differing feelings about this whole crush thing. One is fully on board. The other is still on the shore, arms crossed against their chest, dubious about getting on a ship called "The Titanic 2". The cheerleader is telling me to put myself out there. The aquaphobic one is telling me to guard my heart. They literally had this conversation over my head the other day, as if I wasn't even in the room.

So, which is it? Team risk or team guard?

I recently read this article on Prodigal Magazine where a columnist explores the idea of guarding your heart. What she's actually responding to is the way that phrase has been misused to imply that we as women have a responsibility to hold our emotions close to our chest until the moment we discover that the guy is going to put a ring on our finger, and then we can open up the can of crazy. I know I've heard this at times when I tell friends I'm interested in someone. Just interested. No dates have been had, no phone numbers exchanged. Against what, precisely, do I need to guard my heart against when all I know about a boy is he's cute? Am I basically being told to stop having crushes?

If so, then I am in big trouble...

I'm starting to think that guarding my heart, as it's been pitched to me, is a bunch of bs. I'm 27 years old, and I've never had my heart smashed, which is a huge blessing. But there's something peculiar about hearing 32 crossed in love songs from Taylor Swift who is only 23 years old and not being able to relate. Hey, at least she's trying.

Which is why I might take a hiatus from guarding my heart. Because I may get mashed up, but I'll also write some kickin' pop songs.