Monday, December 28, 2009

Marathon Training Day #1

To date I have ran three half marathons, and in June I have plans to run a full marathon. Tomorrow is day one of my training. I haven't gone running in over a month, and I have a feeling this is going to be the most painful 3 mile run of my life! But, I found that little ear warmer thing that keeps my ears from getting frost bite and for Christmas I got an iPod holder to wear around my arm when I go running. My running shoes have about two more months in them, and my iPod is fully charged, so there is really NO excuse to keep me from going.

I should probably get to bed, so I don't use the excuse of not having enough sleep.

My practices of health and well being (reading my Bible, running, eating well, journaling, etc.) were thrown out of the window while I was in Vancouver this last week and when I went to my weigh-in on Saturday I definitely found I had suffered the consequences. Eeek! What is it about being there that makes me lose motivation to take care of myself? Just a couple months ago I wrote that I thought I was living a half life here in Seattle, and I wondered if Seattle would ever feel like home. Well, it's my third year living here since graduating from college, and it's finally starting to. That's also how much time it took for me to feel at home at SPU. Up until that point I thought for sure I was going to transfer to a different college after my sophomore year.

Maybe there's something about the third year...maybe it's magic.

p.s. Christmas pics soon!

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Dr. Seuss Christmas Party

On Wednesday night our youth group had a Dr. Seuss themed Christmas party. Here are a few of my favorite memories:

One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish!
From left to right: Jon, Marika, Maggie and Myself

From left to right: Marika, Maggie, Josh, and Tim
I created a long and elaborate story about what is going on in this picture, but all that really needs to be said is that it is hilarious.

From left to right (starting with the boy): Evan, Bella, Kylea, Sage, and Natalia

I absolutely adore the above photo, and it means even more when I look and realize that 4 out of the 5 of these students only began attending youth group this year! Pretty amazing that they have come, gotten connected, and started to build a place for them here.

And every good youth group party can only end one way: the hokey pokey.

I found a church on Capitol Hill that is hiring for a part time youth director. I have discovered that youth ministry jobs are pretty hard to come by here in Seattle, so I feel like I need to respond quickly, and I know I'll apply. It's within a good, strong denomination (Covenant) that is very supportive of women in ministry and would be a great opportunity to spread my wings and see how far God can carry me. But, to go there, would mean to leave everything above. And everything above is just so great.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Dress up

I had a job interview today for an account manager position at a hotel. I have realized that the non profit jobs I am seeking are not calling me back because I don't have non profit experience. I have passion, and desire, but no experience. My plan was (is?) to get a regular 9-5pm job that would free up my evenings and weekends to get the experiences I need by volunteering with New Horizons or Street Youth Ministries.

My interviewer was 15 minutes late, so I went to the restroom to freshen up. I looked in the mirror and saw me, wearing a pair of freshly dry cleaned grey slacks, a long sleeved black shirt, black blazer, makeup, with my hair neatly kept and I was struck by my reflection. I felt like I looked like a kid playing dress up. The thought came across my mind like a flash and it scared me a little bit.

I shook it off long enough to engage in the two hour interview. At the end of today's interview with the Director of Sales and then the General Manager, I knew I'd be sending my interviewers an email withdrawing from consideration for the position. The primary reason is that the position would require I purchase a car, which I cannot do with a clear conscience because of the financial burden. As I was riding the bus home (1 1/2 hours long ride) I asked myself, "what am I doing?" Looking at my reflection at the hotel I knew: this isn't me.

I can't work as an account manager at a hotel. It's not what I'm wired to do. I feel like I am back at square one. Scratch that, I'm at square zero. I asked God to make it clear to me what I should do. I just didn't think his response would knock me down on my butt.

Dear God, it's a good thing I trust you, otherwise I'd be pissed off right now. Amen.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

My Puffy Vest

Two years ago a guest at the hotel I work at gave me a puffy vest for Christmas. I wear this vest rarely, and actually had it in a Goodwill bag until the freezing temperatures in Seattle encouraged me to take it out of the Goodwill bag this morning. The reason I don't wear the puffy vest is because it makes me feel like a marshmallow. Not one of those cute little mini marshmallows, but one of those large jumbo marshmallows. But, today my puffy vest made me feel beautiful, and it's because the geniuses at Old Navy had written this on the label:

"She couldn't decide. She loved the magic of a city skyline on a snowy night, but a country meadow under a blanket of snow made her heart beat faster. The truth is everything looks beautiful in winter, including you."

Thanks Old Navy, for the self esteem boost!

Wednesday, December 2, 2009


My Favorite Thanksgiving Moments

1. Watching my little brother put together an amazing feast completely by himself, including a wonderfully moist turkey, homemade stuffing, and sauteed brussel sprouts.

2. Getting to be Cameron's sous chef the night before and helping him cut homemade ravioli.

3. Watching Cameron and Trystan (he's nine years old now, oh my gosh) play a ridiculous role playing game and being very intent as they played together.

4. Playing the board game "Infection" with Cameron and Jason and having the following conversation - Cameron: If Jason comes back and wins this game, I am going to be so done playing. Me: Well, yes you will be done playing, because Jason would have won the game.

5. Sitting at the kitchen table and reading my mom journal entries that I wrote when I was 12 and 13 years old. Oh, the angst.

6. Being requested moment by moment by my niece Willow (now five years old!) to sit by her at dinner, while playing games, and just relaxing in the living room.

Sometimes I think about giving up on family holidays. They bring such anxiety, and tension, and hurt feelings. But I just listed out 6 reasons my Thanksgiving was worth it, and I know that with a little more thought I could have come up with 6 more. So, maybe a few moments of anxiety is worth the 12 that I'll probably remember longer.